Part 10 - You Have To Believe To Begin...

I give you six unremarkable letters simply arranged in a row.  Any school child could have offered them to you just as I did.  Six simple letters, but one amazing word, one thought, one concept that can move mountains and change worlds.

One word that has changed my life.

     Let me start by asking you all to think for a moment, what does the word BELIEF mean?  I think that it means many things to many people, but, as always, let's start with the straightforward dictionary definition:

-BELIEF-

: A FEELING OF BEING SURE THAT SOMEONE OR SOMETHING EXISTS OR THAT SOMETHING IS TRUE

: A FEELING THAT SOMETHING IS GOOD, RIGHT, OR VALUABLE

: A FEELING OF TRUST IN THE WORTH OR ABILITY OF SOMEONE

     Allow me to tell you a bit about this past week and how it has inspired me for this particular posting.  I was given the honor of being asked to be one of the speakers at this week's "success stories" Weight Watchers meetings.  We also spoke about belief during the meeting and the importance of having self-belief.  I spent a good amount of time pondering over just how important this idea of self-belief was to me personally.  I came to the conclusion that without being able to believe in myself and my ability to succeed, I would not have made it this far.  In fact, in my past, I realized that my failures had come when I stopped or rather never started believing in myself.  I had allowed the seeds of doubt to blossom into a vine of destruction that would choke out any hope I had of succeeding.  This time was different some how though.  This time, not only was I succeeding in my battle for my life, I was doing so with gusto.  

 

“You have to believe. Otherwise, it will never happen."

-Neil Gaiman-

     We all have this ability to succeed through self-belief; sadly, I fear that many of us have allowed others to plant seeds of doubt.  To my benefit, I have found myself surrounded by "caretakers of encouragement" while on my journey.  These "caretakers" are people who love and care for me enough to nurture my self-belief and encourage it to grow and to produce fruits of faith and success.  If I can pass anything along to any of you that are struggling not only with obesity but also  in any trials you may have, it would be this.  Encircle yourself with your own "caretakers of encouragement", because there are still going to be those that will plant seeds of doubt and the more positive support you have on your side, the easier it becomes to weed out the doubt and nurture the belief.

      One method I have found that personally was an absolute necessity for me was attending my Weight Watchers meetings.  As I have stated before, this is not a paid advertisement for Weight Watchers, but it is my own personal testimonial.  Weight Watchers WORKS!  When I walk through those doors I don't feel like I am being judged or mocked.  There is only love, understanding, and support there.  It is a safe place full of people that want to nurture your self-belief so that it becomes a powerful tool and a cornerstone of your foundation to success.  My own personal experience has shown me that when I walk through those doors, not only do I receive support but I get to give support and help build self-belief in others as well.  

     I have been very blessed this week.  So many positive things have happened that I cannot possibly have room to give any negative events my attention.  So I say to those that want to bring negativity and doubt to my doorstep, may you find your own source of support and self-belief to guide you to your success, but allow your negativity to roll away as a tumble weed in the dessert.  At the same time I say, if you need some support I will offer you my shoulder and we can all walk on together.  

     Anybody that struggles with weight issues knows that there is cruelty out there.  Words, stares, snickers, and actions that, done by ignorance or maliciousness, can be damaging to us and hinder our success.  There was a time that I would have allowed such people to stop me, but no longer!  I have a new attitude and I look these people in the eye and say, "I am who I am. Your approval is not needed."  Those that choose to accept me for this will be blessed by my amazing wit, humor, insight, and down right AWESOMENESS!  OK OK...perhaps that was a bit far but hey.... I AM WHO I AM.... get it?  Those that can't accept me for that...it is their loss...I will go on.... lol.  As my dear friend Lyle Chipperson once said, " Tss I got buds who are light and some buds who are heavy, and some just normal size. Tss tss".  

     I found this next picture and it was so inspiring to me that I am going to print it for my "Wall Of Reminders". 

Are you going to see the meek kitten or the MAJESTIC KING OF THE JUNGLE?

I know my answer.  What about you?

     I "BELIEVE"...oh I slay me...lol..that I have said enough on this subject so let's talk some numbers shall we??  I am still working on getting more dedicated to an actual exercise program.  I need to light a fire under that particular pot and not be so inconsistent with my routine.  I can proudly report that something that has not happened in the past 20 months is currently happening.  I have PERFECT ATTENDANCE for this month at work.  I have had days where I was not feeling so good but nothing like I was when I weighed in at 674 lbs.  I fully understand that the month is only half over but guess what?  I BELIEVE IN MYSELF TO MAKE PERFECT ATTENDANCE!  Can I get an AMEN!  As promised, here comes the big number...(reggae drum roll please!!):

 POW!!

There it is kids...TRIP-QUINTS...5-5-5 or turn it around 5-5-5!
Yep that means 3 lbs. more eradicated from my gorgeous person!  TEE HEE...just funnin' ya!
The grand total is 119 lbs. and I can honestly say that I can already feel my life coming back.  I will end this week like this...thank you all for supporting me and showing me much love throughout my journey.  Take a moment to believe in yourselves this week and you will see that great things will happen when you believe in you.  Don't forget that when you reach for a hand up in life to reach down and offer one to someone struggling as well.
There is a chance that some incarnation of T-Shirts featuring "Beware The Fatypus!!!" or "Keep It CRISPY!" could be coming.  I have received some requests for some so I ask, are there others out there that would rock one of these T's advertising The Rendering?  
I am working on a few other big things relating to my journey that I will talk about more when I have more concrete details so stay tuned for that.
Remember, if you feel alone I am just a message away if you need some support.  Realize that we are not alone if we just look around.  Much love and God bless you all.  VIVE LA FAT REVOLUTION!!!  To be continued...

Part 9 - Keep It CRISPY!

     In my humble opinion, the first bite of a fresh apple is the best.  You know what I am talking about.  That crispy, juicy bite that each apple promises when you pick it up and decide, "hmm you look tasty".  Assuming that you, the reader, likes apples.  I mean, if you don't, what is wrong with you? LOL...Just a little apple humor folks, just play along.  Honestly, if you think about it, if that first bite was pithy, rotten, too sour, or just plain nasty, would you be enticed to eat more?  Allow me to answer for you...and pardon my crude language but...HECK NO I WOULD NOT!  
     So, now is the part where I find myself needing to say once again, "I have not lost my mind!"  By the end of this posting it will all make perfect sense...well...sense...ok let's just say I might be a little closer to proving my sanity, I hope.  I will start with an apology.  I apologize to all who have supported me on this journey that I have mislead this week.  I posted this on Facebook late Friday night:

"As I lay my head down to go to sleep I am making this announcement with a heavy heart. I am calling it, I quit! My journey is done for any number of reasons. Please voice your complaints and concerns in writing in the comments and I will address them as I feel I can. Thanks for the support. The fat guy."

     Let me reassure you all, I am not quitting and I never was going to.  I posted that because I needed to get true, raw emotional responses from people.  The only way to get them was to do this without people knowing my true motive.  I will say, that you all did not disappoint me.  I received dozens of responses in a very short amount of time.  So you may wonder what motivated me to "need" these responses, here it is.  Throughout this week, I have noticed a rather depressing trend popping up among those that I have spoken with.  I have heard "I quit" or "I can't" or "it is too hard" or "why don't people understand me and what I am going through?"  Please, please, don't misunderstand me.  I have heard all of these from inside my own head as well this week.  I have family members going through terrible times and it stresses me out so I say to myself "I can't" and I find some "comfort" food.  I learned this week that there is a good chance I may be unemployed by April, so what happened?  I said, "I quit", why bother if I won't have any future income or insurance.  Who would hire me with my issues?  Again, please forgive my harsh, sailor-like language, but that negative; go-nowhere thinking is a warm ball of POPPYCOCK!!  Yep, I said it.  Cover the kids' ears and send the old folks out of the room because I am spitting truth bombs!

     I wished that I could say it was only I thinking this, but I am hearing it from others.  Others that I look to for inspiration and support.  If they are giving up on themselves then what about me?  I want all of you that read my post to think back, think of exactly the raw emotion and hurt and disappointment that you felt.  You, who have been my strength and my support, were basically watching me choose death.  I want you to remember the raw nerves that were touched by my announcement.  Remember that when you say, "I quit" or "I can't" or "it is too hard" or "why don't people understand me and what I am going through?" because that is how not only I, but all who love and support you feel when we hear it.  I believe the term I saw in many comments to me was, "tough love".  If we are truly going to support each other then we all need a little "tough love".  I have made two items to help remind me of this.  One is a copy of all of the responses to my post so if I ever need a little boost out of the negative zone I can look to those and be reminded of all of the love and support I have.

     My second reminder I have actually printed out for myself and I am using it as a daily positive affirmation.  I call it...Keep It C.R.I.S.P.Y.:

- KEEP IT C.R.I.S.P.Y. -

·      C – COMMITMENT:

- Go All In and Don’t Look Back.  The Past is the Past. -

·      R – Reality:

- Do Not Sugar Coat the Reality.  There Is No “Easy” or “Quick” Fix, You Have To Work For It and Work Hard -

·      I – INSPIRATION:

- Find One, Then Become One -

·      S – SUPPORT:

- You Are NOT Alone.  Look Around and You Will See -

·      P – PERSEVERANCE:

- You Will Stumble and Fall Accept That and Dust Yourself Off.  Keep Moving Forward -

·      Y – YOU:

- Succeed For YOU!  In The End, The Choice Is Ultimately Yours To Win or Lose -

So there it is folks.  I know acronyms can be a bit silly but it works for me.  As for the bunnies, well, bunnies just love CRISPY treats!  Besides, just look how adorable they are.  If you still need a positive boost just look at them!

     Changing your lifestyle and eating habits can become dull and boring.  When we find this happening we start to become negative and we cut corners.  Cutting corners can lead to bad habits.  So I say, KEEP IT CRISPY!  If you try to make each day as appetizing as that first bite of a fresh, juicy apple you will find it gets easier.  It will be hard, but that is why we have each other to lean on.  I know, it is an odd place in my head but it works for me.  I hope that those of you that are going through troubles can find this a little helpful.  Think of those that depend on you to succeed because you inspire them as much as they inspire you.  KEEP IT CRISPY!

     Ah, I guess it is time to toss out the numbers for this week.  I will be honest, as I said above, I did turn to some "comfort foods" this week so I was dreading stepping on the scale.  Nonetheless, I did climb upon the digital slab of doom and I saw this...(itty bitty drum roll please)...

 Uhh.....what? Wait?

Dang bunnies...they breed like...well you know...sorry.

TA DAAAAA!!!!

     There it is people.  That my good friends is 2 more lbs for a total of 116 lbs. go, going, gone!  I seem to be in a rut of little losses but they are still losses.  I will take it.  I just wonder "what if?"  Therein lies the rub folks, the past is the past and "what ifs?" don't matter.  I am going forward no matter what.

      So I will end the week with a recipe for an awesome Greek salad that my sister found.  So good!  Give it a try and make it your own if you want.  Let me know what you think.  Here it is...

Good For Your Greek Salad –

3 – Large Ripe Tomatoes Chopped – 0 points – WWPF

2 – Cucumbers Peeled and Chopped – 0 points – WWPF

1 – Small Red Onion Chopped - 0 points – WWPF

¼ - Cup Olive Oil – 14 points

4 – Teaspoons Lemon Juice – 0 points

1 ½ - Teaspoons Dried Oregano – 0 points

Salt and Pepper To Taste – 0 points

1 – Cup Crumbled Feta Cheese – 11 points

6 – Black Greek Olives Pitted and Sliced – 2 points

*WWPF - Weight Watchers Power Food

            In a shallow salad bowl, or on serving platter, combine tomatoes, cucumber, and onion.  Sprinkle with oil, lemon juice, oregano, and salt and pepper to taste.  Sprinkle feta cheese and olives over salad.  Serve.  Serves 6.  Much better if you allow a day to marry.

Total Weight Watchers Points – 27 for the whole bowl, 4.5 WW points per serving.

     That is all I have for this week my friends.  As always, thank you all for you support and love.  I would ask that you share this blog with as many people as you can.  On your facebooks, twitters, word of mouth, or just tell random people.  It doesn't matter how the word gets out, just the fact that it gets out and that it is touching lives.  Stay positive this week and keep it C.R.I.S.P.Y.!  I am here if you need a push.  I love you and may God bless you all.  VIVE LA FAT REVOLUTION!!!  To be continued...

Part 8 - The Demon In the Dark

     I am going to start this week's post a little bit differently. I am going to talk about the demon in the dark.  Specifically, my demon.  The demon of addiction.  Merriam-Webster defines addiction as the following:

- ADDICTION -

The compulsive need for and use of a habit-forming substance characterized by tolerance and by well-defined physiological symptoms upon withdrawal; broadly : persistent compulsive use of a substance known by the user to be harmful.

     I am not addicted to drugs, alcohol, or sex.  Sadly, there are times that I feel I would rather be addicted to one of those because my addiction is a bit more trickier.  I know that sounds a bit ignorant to say but think about it for a moment.  Even though it has become a social norm to make drugs, alcohol, and sex evil villains in terms of addiction, these are all addictive sources that can be overcome and exiled.  Once a person addicted to one of these "bad boys" claims a victory, they can banish the substance from their lives.  I, as I have said before, am addicted to food.  I am not saying that my addiction is any more important or worse off than other addictions; I am just saying that it is a bit more trickier.  As I am sure you have figured out, we are living beings and as such, we can not just stop eating.  There is no way to banish or ignore that fact that our bodies need food to survive.  Imagine how successful a heroin addict would be if they had to shoot up even just once a day.  It isn't hard to see that they would not be able to achieve success in kicking their addiction.  Food is a necessary evil to keep us alive, but it can be just as deadly as any substance, in the long run, if abused.

     As you can see from this graph above, obesity is a growing (no pun intended, just a happy accident) issue within the United States.  I personally feel that if you were to take a close look at the ever-increasing numbers, you would find out that the reason is because they too battle addiction to food.  Any person fighting this battle, at one point or another, will begin to question if it is even possible to beat this addiction.  I say to all of you that have questioned this, YES! YES! YES! you can indeed conquer this addiction but you must solve the puzzle...

      I try to keep this thought in mind when I face my demon or when people ask for my opinions or encouragement.  I remind myself that for each one of us, even though our addiction is the same, the pieces will never fit the same.  Fear not though! The pieces WILL fit in the end!  I believe that all of this back and forth encouragement and discussion is helping both myself and others figure out where the pieces go.  Sure, sure, I will admit, I do occasionally try to pound a square piece into a round hole but hey, that's just me...lol.  Someone will slap me in the head and point out that no matter how many corners I try to cut, that particular piece just simply, will not fit in the round hole.  It helps to have people that love me enough to smack me like a skipping record player to get me back on track.  

     Oh the days that I have dreamed away exactly like good 'ole Homer.  That is where it all starts for me.  Trouble in my head leads to trouble in my eating habits.  Here is some science for ya!  The term HIGHLY PALATABLE FOODS refers to foods rich in sugar, salt, and fat.  These foods, when respected and not abused, are fine to have in your diet.  However, the reward signals from highly palatable foods may override other signals of fullness and satisfaction within your brain. As a result, people keep eating, even when they're not hungry.  That right there is not good for a food addict...duh!  So how do we beat this addiction and figure out the puzzle??  You put one foot in front of the other and gets to steppin'...(get ready for some silliness).

DO YOU ALL REMEMBER THIS FELLOW WITH THE LONG WHITE BEARD?

NO?

WHAT?

HE IS THE WINTER WARLOCK!

     For those that are not familiar with who the Winter Warlock is, he is a character from the 1970 TV special, Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town.  Fine, I am sure that there are some of you thinking, "what the hell does this have to do with food addiction?" and no I didn't lose my mind.  In that fine work of art, Winter, as he is called, sings a little ditty that I keep in my head as a reminder of how to start making changes to beat my demon.  If you have never seen this before, please feel free to watch this short clip and be encouraged.  I insist...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=wJ19XeCPG88

     Making small changes in the beginning is the first step.  I have weeded out a lot of the foods that are considered "highly palatable" in my daily diet, although not completely.  Moderation is the key to battling food addiction.  Portion control and constant vigilance is how the demon will fall.  I have replaced the "HP" foods with better options.  Green, leafy veggies, fruits, and water are all great options to help replace foods and they help to fill you up.  A friend told me this weekend that he just won't eat anything "healthy" because it all tastes gross.  One of the most revealing lessons I have learned on this journey is that; all of those "healthy" foods are not gross, they are just different.  I have begun to refine my palate and I am tasting worlds of new flavors all from "healthy" foods.  I also supplement my diet with a treat now and again, remembering to stay vigilant by choosing a healthy option to fill up on.  I find that even a small treat can be enough to satisfy the demon and keep him at bay.  

     As you continue to put one foot in front of the other you will find it gets easier to choose the healthier options.  It is said that you can change your habits by repeating the new habit 21 days in a row.  That is a great goal to start with.  Once you hit day 21, you have planted the seed of a healthier lifestyle and it is sprouting.  Continue these habits for another 60 days or so and you will realize that you have completely replaced the poor habits with the healthy ones.  You may never fully defeat the demon, but by making healthy habits and remaining vigilant you can render the demon powerless.  Claim your victory!

     I think I have said enough so I will announce to you all my numbers for the week.  Are you ready?  Are you sure?  Tiny drum roll please.....

      There it is guys and gals...FIVE SIX ZERO!  I weighed in at the lovely weight of 560 lbs.  That means that I am down 2 lbs. more from last week and a grand total of 114 lbs. overall.  Since this is the first post of September, I am also including my waist measurement.  As of the August 8, 2013 posting of Part 4, my waist measured 72.5" and I can proudly report that this month's measurement is 70" even.  I have dropped a total of 4" from my waist since I began.  I hope that I have been an encouragement to some of you out there and I encourage you to share your success stories with me as well.  I am going to try something new.  I am asking for suggestions for a "mystery" ingredient.  Something that you enjoy eating but would like to find recipes that are healthier and tasty, delicious even!  I will pick one or two ingredients and find a delicious and healthy recipe to share with the group.  That is about all I have for this week.  As always, thank you all for you support and love.  I would ask that you share this blog with as many people as you can.  On your facebooks, twitters, word of mouth, or just tell random people.  It doesn't matter how the word gets out, just the fact that it gets out and that it is touching lives.  I see in my day-to-day life that there are changes happening all around me.  Random people are surprising me by coming up and talking to me about the blog and their own personal journeys.  People are seeing us and the Fat Revolution is hurtling on like a juggernaut.  VIVE LA FAT REVOLUTION!!!  God bless you all.  To be continued...

Part 7 - Butter Is Not The Enemy!

     I know, I know, for somebody that is going down this journey to make a statement like "butter is not the enemy" seems preposterous.  In fact, that statement's meaning is two-fold in regards to this week's post.  I will get to that shortly but now it is time for this week's numbers.  After stepping on the scale this week, here is what I saw...

 

     I was once again pleased to see that the number has gone down.  That means that I have shaved off 3 more of those pesky pounds making the grand total 112 life-sucking pounds.  I am sure that some of you out there reading this blog weigh about this much.  Imagine, if you will, that I have basically lost your entire body weight a weight that I have carried with me every day.  I don't say that to brag (well maybe a little) but to show you that if I, a guy that has tried losing weight multiple times and failed, could succeed then anybody can.  

     This week has had many ups and downs.  I have found myself lacking motivation to write this post so I figured it was time to reevaluate myself.  Take some mental inventory if you will.  I have found that if I do this every couple of weeks, it helps to keep me grounded and focused.  After really taking a good look at myself, I found that even though I am succeeding in losing the pounds, I am not satisfied with my weekly progress.  For the first time in my life I have discovered a hunger that isn't food related.  I have become hungry for success.  I want to do better and better.  I realized this not because I was greedy to lose more weight but because I came to the conclusion that I was growing complacent.  I was getting set into a rhythm that was allowing me to succeed by "just getting by" rather than pushing myself to my full potential.  

     This brings me to the first meaning of "butter is not the enemy".  When people "diet" or try eating healthier one of the first things they do is cut out all "bad" items such as butter.  We as intelligent beings actually vilify items of food.  I have done this many times myself and I see it almost 100% of the time with others either trying to lose weight or offer advice on losing weight.  I have come to terms with the fact that foods like butter are not evil and when used responsibly can be a nice addition to your diet.  They can add flavor to several dishes and offer some nutritional value that we need.  Butter contains fats. Believe it or not, our bodies need fats to function. Fat is essential for organ function, vitamin absorption, healthy skin, hair and nails, and hormone regulation, among other things. Fat also increases satiety, so you stay fuller longer.  The saturated fat found in dairy (milk, butter, cheese, etc.) has vitamins A, E, and K, as well as a multitude of trace vitamins & minerals. Saturated fat is required to make calcium in milk bio-available so that it can be assimilated into the body and it tempers blood sugar spikes from carbs.  Now don't get me wrong, I am not saying we all should eat butter sandwiches and wash them down with a warm mug of drawn butter, but don't fear the butter.  Turn an enemy into a friend and use the butter to help you succeed.

     "Success breeds complacency.  Complacency breeds failure.  Only the paranoid survive."- Andy Grove

     I really like this quote because it reminds me to never bask in my success.  I must be paranoid to survive.  By this I mean that I must not let my life become routine and get in the habit of taking short cuts.  Nor should I ever give up because the journey seems too difficult.  Today is my mother's birthday and although I know that it will be a difficult emotional day, I can hear her speaking words of wisdom as if she were still here.  I would like to share a story that my mother as passed on to us as it was passed to her.  I have seen other versions but this is how I remember it from her...

 One day, two frogs were enjoying the day in the barn when they accidentally fell into the farmer's bucket of cream, and they couldn't get out. The two frogs kept swimming around to keep from drowning, and every once in a while they would try to climb out, but this was becoming very tiring.

One frog kept saying, "This is useless, we should just give up." But the other frog just ignored the comment and kept swimming. Finally, the pessimistic frog gave up and drowned. The other frog was sad at the loss of his friend, but he wasn't going to give up. He kept swimming and swimming, and, finally, the cream turned into butter and the frog simply climbed out.

This story shows us that even if we stumble and others try to pull us down, we have got to keep on swimming because, eventually, the cream will turn into butter and we'll make it out of the pail.

     So, it is with this thought that I again say, BUTTER IS NOT THE ENEMY!  No matter whether you find yourself discouraged, plateaued, hopeless, or in my personal case, complacent, never quit swimming.  Your next kick could be the one that makes the butter and remember, butter can save your life.

     I will finish this week's post with a delicious recipe that I got from my aunt, who is also a Weight Watcher.  It takes a little time to make but it makes 8-10 servings that freeze well.  I portion it out and take them for lunches at work.  You can tweak the recipe for your own tastes but this is the base.  I personally like to add a jalapeno to spice it up.  Here it is...let me know what you think.

Chicken Fajita Soup -

2 - Boneless, Skinless Chicken Breasts (roughly 3 oz each) - 6 points total - WWPF

2 - Cups Chopped Carrots - 0 points - WWPF

2 - Cloves Minced Garlic - 0 points

1 - Large Onion Chopped - 0 points - WWPF

2 - Cups Chopped Celery - 0 points - WWPF

2 - Large Green Peppers Chopped - 0 points - WWPF

8 - Cups Water - 0 points

6-8 - Chicken Bouillon Cubes - depending on taste - 3 points total

1 - Pkg Old El Paso Taco Seasoning (or Fajita) - 0 points

1 - 8.5oz Pkg Uncle Ben’s Brown Basmati Ready Rice - 12 points total

1 - 14oz Can Hunt’s Fire Roasted Tomatoes - 0 points - WWPF

1 - 15oz Can Black Beans - rinsed - 6 points total

1 - Lime - 0 points - WWPF

2 - Tbsp Olive Oil - 6 points total

Salt and Pepper to taste - 0 points

Fat Free Sour Cream - small dollop - 1 point for 2 tbsp

*WWPF - Weight Watchers Power Food

Cube chicken into bite size pieces.  Heat soup pot and add the olive oil.  Brown chicken slightly.  Add carrots, onion, celery, green pepper, garlic and taco seasoning.  Cook until slightly softened.  Add bouillon to water and microwave to boil.  Dissolve bouillon in water to make broth.  Add tomatoes to chicken and veggie mix.  Add broth to mixture and turn heat to medium-low.  Simmer for 20 – 30 minutes until everything is cooked.  Add black beans and rice and heat through.  Season the soup with salt and pepper to taste.  Add the juice of 1 lime to brighten the flavors and serve.  Garnish with a small dollop of fat free sour cream.  Makes 8 – 10 servings and freezes nicely for lunches.

Total Weight Watchers Points – 33 for the whole pot, roughly 4 points per servings or 5 with the sour cream.

     

     With that I will conclude this week's post.  As always, I would like to thank each and every person that reads this blog and lends me their support.  I am humbled to know that you are all behind me.  I could not have accomplished this with out the support and love from you all.  VIVE LA FAT REVOLUTION!!!  God bless you all.  To be continued...

Part 6 - Beware the Fatypus!!!

Beware the Fatypus!!!

 

     That somewhat rotund fellow standing proudly upon the scale is the deceivingly cuddly Fatypus, and he can be down right destructive but you would never know it.  Confused?  I don't doubt it, but never fear, I will clear it all up by the end of this week's post.  

     First, as usual, let me give you all the numbers.  As of this week, I have weighed in at...drum roll please...(insert drum roll in your mind)...

     Yes indeed, that says 565 lbs.!  That means that I have lost another 3 lbs. for a total of 109 lbs. since my journey has begun.  It makes me smile to know that that small person I mentioned losing last week is getting bigger.  So, this week has been a much, much better week all around from last week.  I actually walked 1/2 of a mile in 17 minutes and 54 seconds.  Not too shabby for a man who, just a handful of months ago, could not walk from room to room without taking a break to catch his breath.  5K here I come!  I would like to show you all a couple of awards I received from my Weight Watchers group this week.

      First is my certificate of accomplishment for breaking through the 100 lbs. lost barrier.

      Second is my key chain.  This is to mark another milestone in my journey.  This shows that I have lost more than 10% of my total weight.  I have to say that I am rather proud of my awards and they are serving as a great motivation for me. 

     Now, allow me to shed some light on the ever-dangerous Fatypus.  Throughout my interactions this week revolving around my blog and weight loss, there has been a reoccurring theme that has risen up in conversation.  "Why am I losing weight much slower than before or actually gaining weight?  I am being a faithful follower of my diet/eating plan as well as I am working out multiple times a week."  These words are words that I have heard on several occasions this week.  I have also thought these thoughts a time or two myself.  I pondered how I wanted to address these questions and came up with this.  We have all heard the old cliché answer given that muscle weighs more than fat.  This is a personal favorite of mine because I too have used this to try to explain it to others.  In actuality, a pound of muscle weighs as much as a pound of fat.  Wild right?  I know.  Well, I figured that I would actually provide some facts about this phenomenon of weighing more after dieting and exercise.  I would like to show you all a small comparison of fat to muscle.

     On the left, as you can see, is 1 lb. of both fat and muscle and on the right is 5 lbs. of both.  As you can clearly see, they weigh the same but the fat takes up almost twice as much space.  So here is some of the science behind it.  Muscle is about 18% denser than fat.  A pound of muscle has a lot less MASS than a pound of fat. So, where a pound of fat might fit into a soup can, it may take TWO pounds of muscle to fill the exact same can.  Therefore, we all may be losing the fat pounds but gaining the muscle pounds.  We have to look at other factors for measuring our success.  Do our clothes fit more loosely?  Do we find we have more stamina and energy?  Do we feel better?  How does any of this have ANYTHING to do with the Fatypus?  Wait for it...it is coming, I promise.  I have also found, during my research, that increasing muscle mass may not be the only culprit in why our scales are going the wrong way.  The human body weight will fluctuate day to day and that is how it should be.  There are many factors that cause this.  Needless to say, for women, the time of month can cause fluid retention, which will push the scale up, but did you know that too much sodium and normal exercise could cause fluid retention as well.  The sodium is an obvious fact but I learned that when we exercise, our muscles hold on to water to help repair themselves.  We have to break down our muscles to build them up and they need water for repairs.  On days that we are more active with our exercise, we need to take special care to make sure we provide plenty of water to our muscles.  All of these things can cause the scale to give us a deceiving result.  So here it comes...why must we BEWARE THE FATYPUS?!?!  The Fatypus is what I have started to call my scale.  I would like you to please take a look at these two cuddly pics...

These two adorable fellows make you just want to snuggle them, don't they?  To the left, from the land down under, is the adorable duck-billed Platypus and to the right, just because I loved him, is the wide-eyed Slow Loris.  Still not clear how these boys and the Fatypus have anything to do with each other let alone weight loss or my personal journey?  THEY ARE ALL THINGS THAT YOU MIGHT WANT TO PLAY WITH EVERYDAY BUT THEY WILL MESS YOU UP!!  I know, I get it, you all think I have lost my mind but NO...I am golden!  Let me explain further.  These two cute mammals are VENOMOUS!  Oh yeah, I said it.  Pick these boys up for a cuddle and they could mess you up but good.  So, am I trying to say I have a venomous scale named the Fatypus??  No, don't be silly, but...using your scale everyday while you are working on losing weight and changing you lifestyle can be just as dangerous.  We can get so focused on what number our scale says each day that when we see no change or an increase, it can be damaging mentally.  Again, not to beat a dead horse, our weight changes constantly; fluctuations in that number on the scale every day, or even in the same day, are normal.  Spending too much time worrying about how you've changed from one weigh-in to the next and any slight increase can be demoralizing and can turn a good day into a bad one.  So I have dubbed my scale THE FATYPUS!! to remind me that perhaps I should "handle with care".  I am even going to print out the pic from the top and tape it to my scale so I see him every time I think of stepping on.  I will then know to BEWARE THE FATYPUS!!!  

     To wrap up this crazy ride I say this, work hard, stay committed, and remember, not all success can be measured by a simple number.  Not everything that appears innocent is so take caution.  Encourage each other and those around you in whatever they are trying to overcome.  You have all been a massive encouragement to me and I could not have made it this far without all of your support.  I may not know you all personally, but I love you all and I thank you for showing me so much love.  The Fat Revolution is picking up a head of steam and rolling on strong.  As usual, I ask that you all share on your pages and with anybody who might need some inspiration or have some inspiration to share.  I am convinced that we are starting to change the world one pound at a time.  I hope you all were able to hang with the wild ride that is my mind this week...lol.  God bless you all.   To be continued...

 

 

Part 5 - When It Rains, It Pours

     When it rains, it pours.  A simple yet true statement that would very accurately describe my past week.  Well, before I get too far ahead of myself, let me start with the weekly numbers update first.  Even though I have had a week from hell, I was able to still lose some weight.  Not as much as the past couple of weeks but as I said before, ups and downs will happen but I must keep moving forward.  As of this week, I have weighed in at...

      Yes indeed, that does say 568 lbs.!  LOL....I am down a total of 2 lbs. for the week and an overall total of 106 lbs. for those with mathematical difficulties.  Again, not a large loss this week but still a loss and when I take in to account the total amount of weight lost it doesn't seem real.  I have lost a small person!  Though it may sound harsh, I won't be looking to find that person any time soon thank you.  I have also decided that I will only do a waist measurement update the first post of each month.  I went with this choice because it didn't seem worth posting a fraction of change each week.  

     OK! Now that we have covered this week's updates as far as numbers let me explain the statement, when it rains, it pours.  I have promised full disclosure in my postings so that means the good days with the bad, or weeks as it turns out.  Today marks the six month anniversary of my mother's passing.  I have had so much on my mind this week concerning this.  I can not honestly say why this has bothered me so much, as it is just a date, but it has.  The pain of losing her isn't any worse or better than it was a month or two ago.  I think it has been hard because I have the date of the six month anniversary stuck in my head along with the thought that her birthday is coming up this month as well.  So these thoughts have haunted me all week causing me to battle depression and anxiety worse than normal.  I have also, once again, been stricken with another vile leg infection caused by my obesity.  This has hit me exceptionally hard this time because, in my mind, I have been doing so well losing weight that I had foolishly thought I would be beyond these infections.  I allowed myself to accept what was ultimately an unrealistic idea.  While yes I have lost a lot of weight, I am still super morbidly obese and I will still have to fight the medical issues that come along with that title.  I do not say this to be hard on myself, but rather to keep myself grounded in reality.  The infection was a bad round this time and has kept me out of work all week.  There are people who have said to me to "suck it up and be a man" and I can understand where they are coming from, but they do not have to feel what these infections are like for me.  Missing work is another major area of stress for me this week for multiple reasons.  I need the money and I am scraping and scratching at the bottom of an empty barrel.  I am not able to afford the medical supplies or medicines that I need.  I am very thankful that my doctor is willing to call in the medicine that I need to fight these infections because I can't even afford the co-pays to keep going to see her for the same thing over and over again.  I also need this job because, as I have said before, I don't think anybody else will hire me in this state and the medical insurance is critical for me to have.  I thank God every day that I have an employer that has been so great in helping me through this.  I feel guilty for not being able to keep up my end of the deal with my employer.  I hate being this type of employee.  Believe it or not, I used to be "Mr. Overtime".  I used to work my butt off and was a really good employee.  Obesity has not only robbed me of my life but also of my dignity as a man.  I am working hard to get back to the place I was once at and I pray that I don't lose this job.  My medical issues are also putting a huge strain on my relationship with my father.  He has been one of my biggest supporters but I am not giving back to the household financially.  When I miss work, he and I argue.  The arguments aren't pretty either and I can not say I blame him for being upset.  When I am not able to afford the things I need I turn to him.  He has always helped me out but it isn't right that I am still not able to even support myself because of this damned body.  I am causing him undue stress on his already failing health and the guilt is making my stress and depression even worse.  I have a couple of other family issues that have really been weighing heavy on my heart and mind.  I won't discuss those because they involve others' actions who are not in direct interaction with me, but it is hard to see those you love hurt.  So, that was basically my week.  Stress, depression, anger, guilt, sadness and an overall feeling of helplessness.  I have opened up about all of this in my post this week for one reason.  I have learned a great lesson through all of this hardship.  When it rains, it pours indeed.  When this happens you have two choices.  Either you stand and bitch about the rain falling on your head or you look around you and realize how many friends you have that are holding out umbrellas for you.  I have once again been humbled this week by the support that you all have shown me.  My friend Veronica, who I have yet to meet face to face, encourages me daily with her positivity.  I thank you for that.  My friends Daryl, Jeromie and Sarah have also encouraged me and pushed me to be more active.  Mike and Amber, you are my crutches.  Dan, my brother, you always have got my back.  Aaron, my friend that lets me vent daily and helps keep me sane.  The family Mudge, in all it's forms, my home away from home.  Sue and the Weight Watchers gang, you are positivity personified.  My Facebook family are always there with kind words of encouragement.  There are so many when I look around that I am sure that I am unintentionally leaving many of you out.  I have not forgotten about my family either.  Whether we fight or not I could not succeed without you all and you have shown me unconditional love.  I list all of this because I learned that when it rains it does indeed pour but a drop need never hit my head.  That support encourages me to move on and keep succeeding and for those struggling themselves, I say take a look around and notice all of your own umbrellas.  If you still can't see any I say here...

Have a happy penguin umbrella!  If you need an umbrella during a storm I am here.  I hope that everybody that reads this takes some time to offer an umbrella to somebody in a downpour this week.  It makes a world of difference in a person's life.  

     As a side note, did anybody try out the recipe from last week?  If so please let me know what you thought, good or bad.  Also, let me know if you all would like to see more recipes in future posts.

     I have noticed a declining number in views over the past weeks so I ask you all, please share this with everybody.  We are starting a revolution...THE BATTLE OF OUR BULGE!!!  I don't know about all of you but I intend to win!  God bless you all.  To be continued...

Part 4 - Keep Stepping Up!!

     Two men have decided to climb a mountain.  One of the men is an elderly man and the other is a young man.  As they climb, the younger man begins to pull away from the older man.  The younger man looks back and notices that the older man has stumbled and fallen.  Seeing that the older man has picked himself up and continued his climb the younger man continues confidently.  After a while, the younger man notices that his companion has stumbled many more times and is now sitting on the ground looking discouraged.  Still confident in his own climbing skills the younger man returns to the older man and offers him his hand.  The older man accepts his hand and gets back to his feet dusting himself off.  The younger man says to him, "Don't give up, you can not climb a mountain without stumbling and falling every so often.  The trick is to get yourself back up and dusted off.  Take a look toward the peak you are climbing to and keep stepping up."  Encouraged, the older man thanks the younger man and they part ways again.  As the climb continues the younger man has pulled far ahead and out of sight of the older man.  Stumble as he might the older man never gives up.  When he falls, he hears the younger man's voice in his head and goes on encouraged.  Later in the climb the older man comes across the younger man sitting on a rock looking exhausted.  The younger man confesses to the older man that he has no energy or drive left and he can't finish his climb.  The older man takes the younger man's hand and offers his shoulder to lean on.  He says, "You can not climb a mountain alone.  Let me help you and together we will look toward the peak and keep stepping up."  Together the men reached the peak and stood above the world.  

     This is a simple story but it is a source of encouragement for me.  Let me take a moment to welcome you once again to The Rendering.  For any that are new to my blog, this is a written account of my own personal battle with obesity.  My journey to conquer this "mountain" of mine and to stand above the world having reclaimed my life.  This week has had it's ups and downs but mostly ups.  I have spoken with several people this week that are on their own journeys and a common theme among them was how they get discouraged when they stumbled.  I too stumble and we all will from time to time.  When I do, I think of this story and I realize that even though I do stumble I have climbed so far already and I get up, dust myself off, and keep stepping up toward my goal.  I also remind myself that I am not alone on this mountain and that when I am tired and discouraged there are always shoulders available to lean on to help me get to the peak.  I want everybody to know that you are not alone either and we will make it together!  Once again I would like to thank everyone for the support you have all shown me.  Your kind words make me keep pushing myself.  I have not felt so good in a long long time.  I guess I will give you all the numbers.  Here we go:

     That's right folks.  That is a picture of my scale from this week's weigh in and it reads 570 lbs!  I am down 8 lbs. from last week and (drum roll please...) I am down a total of 104 lbs. from the beginning of my journey!  My waist was 73" last week and is 72.5" this week.  I am so excited because I can already feel the freedom.  As I have previously mentioned, I attend Weight Watchers meetings and they have been a huge encouragement for me.  Here are my key chain charms that I have received for losing 25, 50, 75, and my most recent achievement 100 lbs.

     I actually went to the driving range this weekend and hit some golf balls with some very old and dear friends.  Then they some how convinced me to play a bowling video game on Xbox Kinect and I loved it!  I know that these may sound like simple things but I not been able to do things like this in years and it was great to do something physical.  I can't wait to see what I try next.  I have mapped out my new walking trail and it is exactly 1/2 of a mile.  I am going to be timing myself each lap so I can work on improving my speed.  I have had several suggestions to do the "couch to 5K" program.  I don't see myself running a 5K anytime soon(yet) but this is where I am starting.  I am calling it my "couch to 500" program because it is getting me off of my butt and I am going to make 500 lbs by Christmas.  I am always looking for walking buddies if anybody wants to go with me.  

     I had a doctor appointment this week for more blood work and to check on my progress with my weight loss.  Here are some important numbers I thought I would share with everybody.  There has been one month between my last two blood tests so this is how I have improved...

Triglycerides which are factors with heart disease, stroke, and diabetes are normal below 150 mg/dL. I was 111 at the first test and 72 as of this week.

LDL Cholesterol(bad type) is normal between 0-100mg/dL.  I was 130 at the first test and 76 as of this week.

Finally, my BP was 142/100 when we began and this week it was 150/82.  Even though the systolic number went up, the diastolic number has dropped significantly.  We are still fiddling with the right medicine combinations to level it out but I will get there.  Overall, my doctor was very pleased with my progress and so am I.  

     Lastly, I would like to talk about a support system.  As the young, confident climber in my story learned, we can not climb this mountain alone.  I have several layers for my own personal support system.  At home I have my father and my sister that support me fully.  I have to admit that sometimes I don't care for the way they support me but that is what I need.  They refuse to serve me meals or bring me things in general and that has motivated me to get up and do for myself.  I then have outside family and friends to turn to as well for my next level.  They are just a phone call away if I need some encouragement or a buddy to workout with or go to a meeting with.  My final level of support has come from places like this blog and the management team where I work.  As well as people who may not know me personally but are still encouraging me to keep stepping up when I stumble.

     I have decided that I am going to include in my posts a recipe that I have found not only to be delicious but also helpful in my journey.  Try this out because it is awesome!  Let me know what you think or any tweaks you might make to it.

          

Total Time:

30 min

Prep

10 min

Cook

20 min

Yield:

2 servings

Ingredients

• Two 6-ounce tilapia fillets – 3 points per serving
• 2 tablespoons olive oil – 3 points per serving
• 2 tablespoon lemon juice – 0 points per serving
• 2 cloves garlic, minced - 0 points per serving
• 2 plum tomatoes, chopped & seeded - 0 points per serving
• 1 small shallot, minced - 0 points per serving
• 2 teaspoons chopped fresh thyme - 0 points per serving
• 2 teaspoons chopped basil - 0 points per serving
• Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper - 0 points per serving

Directions 

Preheat the oven to 450 degrees F. 

Combine the garlic, tomatoes, shallots, parsley, basil, thyme, olive, lemon and some salt and pepper in a small bowl. Allow mixture to set for about 15 minutes to marry flavors.  Lay each fillet out on its own piece of foil. The foil should be a few inches longer than the fillet.  Top each fillet with the tomato mixture. Fold over the foil and roll up the edges to create a seal.

Place on a baking sheet and bake for 15 to 20 minutes. Serve removed from the foil on a bed of cooked brown rice (1 cup per serving – 5 points per serving) with veggies on the top and any sauce drizzled over the fish.  As a side steam 3 cups of chopped asparagus and serve 1 ½ cups per serving sprinkled with lemon juice (0 points per serving).

 

Serves – 2

Total Weight Watchers Points Per Serving - 11

   

     As I close this week's post I will leave with a cautionary bit of advice.  On your journey, as it is in my own, keep your eyes open and be honest and real with yourself.  It is easy to allow yourself to try to "play" the system or program that you are using.  I have lied to myself in the past saying "I can eat just a little of this and make up for it at this other point."  If I am being honest, I was only making excuses to enable myself for failure.  Stumbling is OK because we all will but accept it for the truth that it is and don't make excuses.  I have to humble myself and own my slip ups when I make them.  Then I just look up, refocus, and keep stepping up.  As always, thank you all for being there with support and please keep the encouragement and positive thoughts, prayers, and words coming along with your questions.  Please share this on your Facebook pages or other sites that you use so perhaps my story will encourage somebody else and will convince them that they are not alone either.  Let's start a fat revolution and save some lives!  God bless you all.  To be continued...